Reflections on Motherhood - Part 1

This is the first of three posts about God's plan for Motherhood.

The Gift of Motherhood

I didn't want to begin with a dictionary-type definition of Mother, so as I was browsing through various articles and devotionals, I found the description that seemed to be a good overall summary of that word.

• “Mother means selfless devotion, limitless sacrifice, and love that passes understanding.”

From the time they are toddlers, most girls think about becoming mommies. They “mother” their dolls, their puppy dogs, and their younger siblings. As they grow older, they dream about their future children – how many, what sex, what names. Then, for most, that day finally comes when that tiny new life is put into her arms, and the enormity of the responsibility of motherhood begins to set in.

Let’s think about the idea of that innate nurturing need and the biological need to be a mom. Now to be fair, not every female has a strong sense of nurturing. I didn’t like dolls all that much when I was a little. I was much happier playing cowboys and Indians, cops and robbers, and army maneuvers than dressing a doll and pushing a toy baby carriage. But when I did become a mom, that nurturing thing kicked in. That sense of nurturing and the biological need to have children is a God-planted seed in us placed there in the very first woman, Eve, and passed down throughout generations to us.

Non-believing scientists will tell us that it is simply nature’s way of propagating the human race. And it is – with a twist. The twist being God – it is His way of continuing the humanity He first created.

With that spiritual twist, we see that motherhood, parenthood, is much more.

Motherhood is a gift from the Father of life!

·     Psalm 127:3-5 – Don’t you see that children are God’s best gift? The fruit of the womb His generous legacy? Like a warrior’s fistful of arrows are the children of a vigorous youth. Oh, how blessed are you parents, with your quivers full of children! (MSG)

And besides continuing the human race, He gives us the gift of children to teach us about the character of God.

We learn about who God is through those parental, familial relationships. The fruit of the Spirit listed in Gal. 5 is a snapshot of God’s character – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Those words are all nouns – things. God is love; God is peace; God is patience, etc.

·     Eph. 5:1 – Imitate Christ, therefore, in everything you do, because you are His dear children.

If we are to be imitators of Christ, WE are to be love; WE are to be peace; WE are to be patience, etc. All of those take on a deeper meaning when one becomes a mom. As we understand what it is to love someone enough that we would give our lives for her/him, we begin to understand the Father’s great love for us. As we understand the patience it takes to teach a little one right from wrong, we begin to understand the patience the Father has for us as we continue to miss the mark of what He desires for us.

The other aspect of being imitators of Christ is that legacy part of Psalm 127. Just as Jesus taught the twelve disciples about God and prayed for and with them, we are called to do the same with our children. That is our legacy. Leading our children to salvation and a life lived by faith.

·     2 Timothy 1:5 – (Jesus writing to young Timothy) I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice. And I know that same faith continues strong in you.

That is a legacy of faith!

All of us know mothers in all stages of motherhood.

Some are young, not very far along on their journey. Hopefully, they are hearing some wise words about how God wants them to parent – By being an imitators of Christ, asking themselves and Him what He would do in various situations they find themselves in as parents.

Some facing the empty nest, hoping they've prepared their children for independence, making their own decisions and choices. Hopefully, they are hearing that they never stop modeling Christ-like behavior and attitudes. And they never stop praying fervently for their children.

Some have nests have been empty a long time. Their children are adults with families, jobs, and responsibilities of their own. Hopefully, they are watching the fruit of their labor (their legacy) live successful and God-honoring lives. But even in those later years, parents are to continue to be imitators of Christ. That means they continue to live and model Christ-like behavior and attitudes, and most importantly, continue to pray fervently for their children and now their grandchildren.

Many Christians would stop there and think this been a good uplifting message to mothers around Mother’s Day. But that would be ignoring the elephant in the room. However, I am led to write a word about that elephant and to the mothers of those elephants.

That will be posted in Part 2 of this 3 part series on Reflections on Motherhood.

For now, remember that Motherhood is a gift from the Father in which we get to participate with Him in the creation of life. It comes with tremendous responsibilities, of which, being an imitator of Christ in our home has the most eternal effect on our children.

Praying More Than the Normal Routine Prayer

 
 

When we pray, we pray for people who fall into one of two categories: 1) they are unbelievers, or 2) they are believers. Should there be a difference in how or what we pray for these two groups? The answer is two-fold. Let me explain.

For someone in either category - saved or unsaved, we have the privilege of voicing our concerns about them to the Lord. Those concerns usually deal with health, safety, and help with pressing issues in their lives. And quite frankly, those are the items most on our minds. However, as important as any of those things are, there are things more important than any other that we should discipline ourselves to pray. For the unbeliever, it is salvation. Without a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, that person has no access to the power that will enable her to face whatever life brings. For the one who is already a believer, the most important thing we can pray is that her relationship with Him grows deeper each day.

It is pretty easy for most Christians to pray the routine, habitual prayers about daily life for ourselves and for those we know and love. It takes a deeper commitment to pray deeper prayers about growth. I am not sure why that is unless it is because we haven't grown deeper in our own personal relationship with Him. It is hard to pray for something we don't understand ourselves or think is not that important.

So, how do we learn to pray this kind of powerful prayer for those we love? We only have to look to Paul for instruction. When he was writing his letter to the church at Philippi, his heart's desire was that they would grow to know and love the Lord Jesus more deeply than they could even imagine. Paul was experienced in that kind of relationship with the Lord and knew of the great benefits and abundant life that results from knowing Him on an intimate level.

In Philippians 1:9-11, Paul prays for the believers in that church, and in so doing, teaches us how to pray for other believers. In those verses, he prays for spiritual maturity, godly character, and he tells what the results those two things will bring the believer.

Philippians 1:9 - And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in real knowledge and all discernment

Love - This means Christ's love in you! And your love for Christ! The love used here is the agape love defined in 1 Cor. 13. It is the unconditional love that is not based on emotion or circumstances that God has for us. For a believer, this love comes from the Holy Spirit living in her heart. In this verse Paul is praying that the believers' love for Christ will continuously grow and overflow. 

Knowledge - Knowledge of Him, meaning to know Him intimately - who He is, His character, His love for us, His desires for us. Remember, He knows each one of us so intimately that He knows the number of hairs on our head and our deepest, hidden thoughts. He wants us to know Him in the same, most personal way.

Discernment - Spiritual discernment is the ability to distinguish God's will, what is right and moral in His eyes, and the difference between good and evil. Spiritual discernment is only available to believers as it is directed by the Holy Spirit.

These three qualities that Paul prays for his believer-friends to have are each a characteristic of Christ. Ultimately, he is praying that as they grow spiritually, they will become more and more like Christ.

Philippians 1:10a - So that you may approve the things that are excellent,

Approve - "Approve" means to acknowledge and apply to one's own life....

Things that are excellent - Those things that are of God, those things He approves of.

Praying that our believer-friends grow spiritually and mature in their personal relationship with Christ is one of, if not the most important thing we can ask for them. Because as they mature, they will be better equipped to deal with life's issues no matter how tough or tragic. Their ears will be sensitive to the leading of the Spirit and sensitive to the attacks of the evil one.

 Philippians 1:10b - in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ,

 Sincere - In the original language, this word has two meanings that pertain to this context. One is "tested by sunlight." A sincere believer is not afraid to stand in the light - set apart from the world. The same idea as being a light in a world of darkness. The second is "to whirl in a sieve." The idea of winnowing process of removing chaff from the grain.

Blameless - This word means "without offense." Our lives should not offend our holy God!
As God works in our believer-friends maturing them spiritually so that they become more like Christ, they will reap results and blessings.

Philippians 1:11 - having been filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, to the praise and glory of God.

Fruits of righteousness - Every believer has the fruit of the Spirit within her because of the presence of the Holy Spirit. But a growing, maturing believer is aware of the fruit and is able to live life in that fruit and exudes that fruit to those around her. As her relationship with Christ is "right" and intimate, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control are present and ever growing and overflowing. (Galatians 5:22-23) Other examples of the fruit of righteousness consists of winning the lost (Romans 1:13), holiness (Romans 6:22), good works (Colossians 1:10), and praise (Hebrews 13:15). 

So, as we think about how to pray for our believer-friends, let's remember to not only pray for their present needs and issues, but also to pray for their spiritual maturity. As one matures in Christ, everything else falls into place. She will take on more and more of Christ's character, and she will live more and more in the abundance of His fruit. And hers will be a life that brings glory and honor to the Lord Jesus Christ!

The Choice is Ours To Make

Paul's letter to the Philippian church is a call to live out the Christian life joyfully - in the pleasant seasons of life as well as through the storms that come our way. Through the first two chapters, he crystalizes a concept that has been turning over in my mind, and I want to challenge each of us to give it serious consideration as we continue to traverse the journey set before us. The concept is about the choice we must make in order to live in the joy that Paul talks so much about.

Paul put into perfect perspective the choice we have as believers and followers of Christ Jesus. In Philippians 1:21 he says, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." His whole purpose in life was to speak out boldly for Christ and to become more like Him. Living means developing eternal values, living those values out, which brings the fruit of the Spirit into one's personal experience even in the darkest of days, and helping others find and live those values out through a personal relationship with Christ. When that is your heart's desire and your perspective on life, then dying is even better! In death, there is no more suffering, none of the "issues" that plague us, plus the fulfillment of seeing Christ face-to-face! 

If we don't choose that path, then we live in Philippians 2:21 where he says, "For they (those who are not believers AND those believers who do not fix their eyes consistently on Christ) all seek after their own interests, not those of Christ Jesus." Believers who seek their own interests are the ones who are overcome by the storms of life. They are drowning in their own self-pity, despair, depression, frustration, and/or anger because of what life has brought their way. These are the most frustrated, unhappy people on earth because deep in their heart is the Spirit's call to refocus their mind on the Christ - in whom they once put their trust.

Obviously, no one has reached perfection, and we won't until that day when He calls us home. So for now, it is impossible for us to live completely and solely in 1:21. However, we do choose from which perspective we strive to consistently live our lives. For some, it is a conscious, overt choice. For others, it has become a choice of omission. 

I know from scripture that each of us lives consistently in one of those choices.  We either live for Christ, doing our best and with the help of the Holy Spirit striving everyday to fix our gaze on Him and allowing Him to guide us in all that we do. Or we live for ourselves, giving an occasional glance His way. There is not much middle ground on this issue. We either are - or we aren't. 

This concept has really hit me as I ponder my life and the issues my family and I have been and are dealing with in the last year or so. There are things that I have not shared publicly because I am not at liberty to do so. But just know that you are not alone in facing down the giants of heartache and heartbreak. It comes to all of us as seasons we must pass through. Let's choose to live in 1:21 and live for Christ in the good times and the bad. And let's choose to be burdened believers as Epaphroditus was - burdened for the needs and concerns of others (Philippians 2:25-30). And let's choose the Word of God and prayer as our spiritual weapons to use to spread our faith and defend our faith and that of our sisters in Christ. When we choose to live for Christ, we are choosing joy!

Called to Be Different.....Part 3 - Final

For the past couple of posts, we have been exploring the principle that believers in the Lord Jesus are to be different than the world. (See Part 1 and Part 2) The Bible's definition of different is holy. Every follower of Christ is called to be holy.

• For God saved us and called us to live a holy life. He did this not because we deserved it, but because that was His plan from before the beginning of time - to show us His grace through Jesus Christ. 2 Tim. 1:9 NLT

We also established that holy does not mean perfect - only Christ was capable of perfection when He walked this earth as a man. But we are to be imitators of Him. (Eph. 5:1)

Being holy begins in the mind by allowing the Holy Spirit to filter our thoughts and attitudes. Our goal should be to first think like Jesus....

• And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2 NAS

Jesus's thought patterns were framed by the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Gal. 5:22-23) The ATTITUDES OF CHRIST!

Once those ATTITUDES take root in our hearts, the ACTIONS OF CHRIST will follow.

What do those ACTIONS look like? Well, we saw the ATTITUDES lived out through Jesus in ACTS of kindness, mercy, and compassion. However, sometimes it is easier to understand a concept by acknowlegding what it is NOT.

• It is obvious what kind of life develops [when not allowing the Spirit to conform you]:
  
  repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage; frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness; trinket gods; magic-show religion; paranoid loneliness; cutthroat competition; all consuming-yet-never-satisfied wants; a brutal and divided temper; an impotence to love or be loved; divided homes and divided lives; small-minded and lopsided pursuits; and vicious habits of depersonalizing everyone into a rival; uncontrolled and uncontrollable addictions; ugly parodies of community. I could go on. Gal. 5: 19-21 The Message
• Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these... Gal. 5:19-23 NAS
  
  

Both of those translations tell us plainly what followers of Christ should NOT act like. Reading over that list is like reading today's newspaper - it IS the world!

Now, let's be clear - to live without any of those actions - ever - is to live a perfect life. We can't achieve that, so there will be times when some of those actions will creep up on us. When they do, we need to recognize from whence they come and repent. But overall, none of those actions should be prevelant, or, in other words, a habit, in the life of a Christ follower.

Because....if we ARE walking with Jesus, our minds are being transformed - an on-going process

 until we are finally perfected in heaven.

The more our lives are transformed into the image of Christ, the more different our normal becomes. And that's okay! Our normal should be different from the world's normal in both ATTITUDES and ACTIONS.

• If you lived on the world's terms, the world would love you as one of its own. But since I picked you to live on God's terms and no longer on the world's terms, the world is going
  to hate you.
  John 15:19 The Message

If you are a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, there is a call on your life - a call to holiness.

• As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior...1 Peter 1:14-15 NAS

As I think about being different from the world, I have to be honest and say that I don't always want

 to be different, and it's not always easy to be different. But I do have this promise from God's Word:

• ...I couldn't be more sure of my ground - the One I've trusted in, can take care of what He's trusted me to do right to the end. 2 Tim. 1:12 The Message

Are you hesitant to be different from the world around you, or are you willing to allow God's Spirit to live out His holiness through you?

Called to Be Different...Part 2

In part one of this series, we explored what it may feel like to be different from those around us. We also discussed the idea that normal is relative - everyone's normal is a bit different - thank goodness! As believers in Christ, our normal should not look like, sound like, act like, or think like the secular world in which we live.

2 Cor. 5:17 -  This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! NLT That's where the idea of "born again" comes from.

So what is this new life supposed to look like? We find the answer to that question - probably hundreds of times - in both the Old Testament and the New Testament.

• Be holy for I am holy. Lev. 11:44, 19:2
• You are holy to the Lord. Ezra 8:28
• ...but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior because it is written, "You shall be holy, for I am holy." 1 Peter 1:15-16

Now, let's get one thing on the table and understand it. Holy does not mean perfect! We usually think of those two words as one in the same, but that's not biblical. Jesus Christ, who is God in the flesh, is the only person who was and can ever be perfect - because He is God! We are called to imitate Christ, not BE Christ!

• Therefore, be imitators of Christ... Eph. 5:1

To imitate Him means to take on the attitudes, actions, and thoughts of holiness. The word holy is defined as being different or set apart. Thinking about the earthly life of Jesus, there is no question that He fits that definition. He was definitely different; His was a different kind of normal.

To understand how we are to adapt to that kind of normal, we must make some observations about His life and how it was different from those He walked among. To understand God's character and Jesus' attitudes and actions, we only have to look to the fruit of the Spirit.

• But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control... Gal. 5:22-23

Fruit is the by-product of life, which re-generates life, and the cycle continues. Spiritual fruit, then, is the by-product of life with the Spirit - God's Spirit. This is fruit that we normally would not produce of ourselves.

For example, there are some people that are hard for me to love - if not impossible. If left to myself, I would not love them, but choose to ignore or even forget about them. But the Spirit's love doesn't work that way. When Jesus passed by a blind begger, He felt love and compassion for him. This was a person who, in that society, was shunned and left to fen for himself, so he would sit, probably in the same place everyday, and beg. Most people would walk out-of-their way to NOT come close to this man. But Jesus walked right up to this blind man, spread some mud on his eyes, and healed him! (John 9:1-11)

We saw Jesus approach the unapproachable again when he visited with the adulterous woman at the well in John 8. Another person who society shunned because of her lifestyle, but Jesus treated her with kindness and gentleness as He shared His forgiving news with her.

And who can doubt the presence of the Holy Spirit's peace during His trial and crucifixtion? He was totally at peace as false accusations were shouted at Him and as He was beaten and flogged with the cat-of-nine tails. He was totally at peace as He gave up His life on the cross.  (John 19)

Therefore, part of being different in this world means we are to live in the fruit of the Spirit as Jesus did. If we can experience the kind of peace that the human mind cannot comprehend (Phil 4:7) in the midst of stress and tragedy, we are learning to live like Jesus. When we can allow joy to trump our sorrow, we are learning to live like Jesus. As we love the unlovable and approach unapproachable with kindness and gentleness, we are learning to live like Jesus.

As we learn to live like Jesus, we are becoming holy - set apart, different from the secular world. What is normal for someone learning to live like Jesus will look, think, and act differently from the world.

• ...God has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given us through Christ Jesus. 2 Tim. 1:9

Answering that holy call will mean a new and different normal for us. Are you willing to be different?

The Intercession Factor...

One of the privileges and responsibilities believers have is to intercede on behalf of others with the Father.

An intercessor is one who goes between two or more parties to plead the case of one of those parties. One example of that in our culture is a lawyer. A lawyer goes before the judge and pleads the case of his client. He is the client's representative, his spokesman. Another example is when a person, usually a relative, has the power of attorney or medical power of attorney for another. The holder of the power of attorney can represent or speak on behalf of the other. In the case of medical power of attorney, that holder may "intercede" with physicians to insure that the person's end of life wishes are carried out.

Intercession is a powerful role and an important role. Just think, what if a parent or sibling asked you to be his/her spokesman and to inform family, friends, and physicians what his/her desires are when he/she cannot speak for himself/herself? What a heavy responsibility! But what an honor that the person chose YOU to speak for him/her!

Isn't that one of the things the Father accomplished by sending Jesus to this earth? Jesus became an intercessor for humanity, but also on an individual basis. Jesus is our go-between! Through Him, we have confident access to the Father - the creator of all that was ever created.

The Garment of Humility

There is an invisible shroud that follows me around and raises its ugly head once in a while. It gets in my way, changes my plans, disrupts my schedule; it even causes me to think, do, and say things that I know are not nice! Sometimes it prevents me from complimenting or affirming someone, sometimes it keeps me from asking for help or admitting that I don't know what to do in a situation. There are times when this shroud can be a positive thing, but usually its results are negative.

Have you figured out what my shroud is? I suspect that it follows you around as well. Its name is Pride.

We all know how destructive Pride can be in our lives.

• Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling. Prov. 16:18

I am not going to elaborate on it here - I'm afraid that, if I did, I would never get around to the point of this post. So what is my point:? To look at the antidote to the shroud of Pride - the garment of Humility.

• Humility - 1) Not proud or arrogant, 2) having a feeling of insignificance, 3) low in rank, importance, status (dictionary.com)

What about those definitions rubs you the wrong way?!! All of them, of course. "Sounds" so good, but oh so difficult to live out.

• All of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for "God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble." Therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, and He will lift you up in due time. 1 Peter 5:5-6

Humility is an attitude that is lived out in actions. Attitudes and actions are a matter of choice. I can choose to be humble - or not. But as I think more and more about emulating Jesus, I think of Philippians 2:5 - In your lives, you must think and act like Jesus. (NCV) To think and act more like Jesus, I am going to have to make some choices and some changes.

Making a conscious decision to choose humility should be birthed out of the understanding that humility is one of God's characteristics - it's His nature to be humble. Jesus lived out his nature, and one of the most dramatic examples of His humility is found in John 13:3-5:

• Jesus knew that the Father had given Him authority over everything and that He had come from God and would return to God. So He go up from the table, took off His robe, wrapped a towel around His waist, and poured water into a basin. Then He began to wash the disciples's feet, drying them with the towel he had around Him. (NLT)

God, the creator of the universe, the One who breathed everything into existence, came in the form of a man, and before He was arrested and executed, He became like a lowly servant and washed the dust from His friends feet! Think about that....that's a WOW!

And then the ultimate picture of humilty -

• He humbled Himself in obedience to God and died a criminal's death on a cross. Philippians 2:8 (NLT)

How do we even begin? It begins in our minds - as a choice.

• You must have the same attitude that Christ had. Philippians 2:5 (NLT)

That is only achieved when we spend time with Him in His Word everyday - consistently. Humility is not part of our human nature, and it is not part of the Fruit of the Spirit. It's an attitude which results in action that we choose to take on. If we choose to live and act like Jesus - knowing that it is only possible through the power of the Holy Spirit living in us, then we must choose to lay aside the shroud of Pride and put on the garment of Humility.





The Old Oak Tree...

It seems that many of my Bible readings lately deal with the same theme: the reasons and benefits of meditating on God's Word. The Bible study I'm doing right now, "Following God With All Your Heart," makes that point in every lesson. But even when I'm just doing some "free" reading of the scriptures, the idea of being in the Word shows up! I guess the Lord is really trying to get that message across to me!

One such reading took me to Psalm 1 a few days ago. I have dubbed it the "Oak Tree" Psalm - even though it doesn't actually mention an oak tree! I love oak trees! I grew up in an area where the old, stately oak trees were very common. In fact, we had several in our front yard. There is a reason that the oak tree is the symbol-tree usually used in family trees and ancestry data. It grows tall and wide, is fairly disease-free, and has a root system that grows to China! It is a symbol of longevity and stability. I love oak trees!

That's why when I read Psalm 1:2-3, I immediately think "oak" tree.

"He whose delight is in the Word of God and who meditates on it day and night, will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and its leaf does not wither, and in whatever he does, he prospers."

My interpretation: The person who loves the Word and who studies it consistently will be like a tree ...

• firmly planted -  deeply rooted, a tower of stability and security, able to withstand the storms of life
• by streams of water - nourished and fertilized, which enables its roots to grow deep and healthy
• will bear fruit in season - life produces results, by-products are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control, which abound when needed (in season)
• its leaf does not wither - doesn't fade in heat or drought - when the storms of life pound and blow
• ...he prospers - meditating and applying God's truths and wisdom results in God's approval and blessings upon his life

That sounds like an oak tree to me!

When my parents built that house with the big oak trees in the front yard, my dad quickly planted other trees in the back yard. He loved trees and wanted shade in the back like we had in the front. His tree of choice to plant was the fruitless Mulberry because of its fast-growing nature. Well, they did grow and grow quickly. We had shade within three years. And by year ten, the trees were gone. Their root system doesn't grow deep; it grows wide! It is not a firmly planted tree. The roots grow right under the surface of the ground, which causes all kinds of problems from ruining the yard to making the tree susceptible to crashing when the terrible storms of Tornado Alley blow through.

So, if asked whether I want to plant oak trees or mulberry trees in my yard, I have to go with the oak. I know the oak takes longer to grow and become the beautiful tree of my childhood, but I want a firmly rooted tree that will weather the storms.

I want my life to be like the old oak tree in the front yard of my childhood home. How do I do that? - By delighting in His Word and meditating on it consistently.

You know, I am really glad God keeps reminding me of the lessons I need to learn and apply. It's sort of like the yellow ribbon around the oak tree! He constantly reminds me of His love and desires for my life.

I love oak trees!

The Attitude of Gratitude...

I am all about peace, love, and joy– I’ve said before that I am definitely a child of the ‘70’s! When I was in high school, I cruised around in my parents’ old Pontiac with wire-rim glasses, long, straight hair, and hippy beads. “Peace” was our by-word. My bedroom door was filled with strings of beads, and when I was home, incense was burning in some weird jar on my dresser, and I was strumming the guitar. My airwaves were

A Rendition of My High School Days

 bouncing with John Denver, Bread, or The Beatles. I truly was a hippie-wanna-be! But I was never truly a hippie. Why? Goodness knows that countless others in my generation totally embraced the attitude and lifestyle of that culture that so changed America’s values and even our society’s vision of God.  

I know what happened – or didn’t happen – to me. I didn’t cross over into hippiedom because I never fully embraced the defining, life-changing elements of that culture – drugs and the sexual revolution. Thirty-plus years of hindsight makes me so grateful that I didn’t because I see the evolution of our culture due to those troubled years. And, as you know, what we see is not all that good.

There are three reasons why I didn’t choose that path. One was availability. I grew up in a small town, the daughter of a preacher, who gave a daily devotional and prayer on the school’s PA system every morning. I didn’t run with the crowd that got into drinking and drugs – and no one was chasing me down to offer them to me. At times, I thought I was not very cool, but I know God was protecting me. A second reason for not choosing that path was pure fear – of my parents! I loved life and sure didn’t want it to end prematurely. That might sound flippant, but I truly feared the anger of my parents, the disappointment in their eyes, and the alienation from them that it would bring. Lastly, there was something inside me that just knew  those choices were not right. That something was the Holy Spirit. I asked Jesus to be my savior when I was nine years old, and I was raised in an atmosphere of reverent respect for the Lord. Now don’t get me wrong; I wasn’t a perfect child and teenager. I have my share of wild stories, but I just never got comfortable even desiring those things that my generation was so quickly embracing. I am so very thankful to the Father that the whispers and sometimes yells of the Holy Spirit were heard by my heart and mind.

So, here I am, thirty years later, still all about peace, love, and joy, knowing that those are part of the fruit of the Spirit that lives inside me. I have experienced them and enjoy them immensely. But I wonder sometimes why I have peace one day, then worry or fear the next. I enjoy love and joy for a while only to realize that they have slipped away – again. What is keeping me from living in those attributes everyday? Again, I find myself faced with a choice. That choice is found in Philippians 4:6-7 but can be easily overlooked if I am not careful. Look at those two verses, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

With thanksgiving…The attitude of gratitude! If I want peace to guard my heart and mind, to keep it from going into the overdrive of irrational thought that leads to fear, insecurity, low self-worth, etc., I must come to Him thankful for everything that comes my way. Now, it’s easy to be thankful for the all the good in my life, but giving thanks for the insignificant, the not-so-good, and the really awful circumstances and situations is a different thing! Sometimes unfair and or even tragic things happen to me or to those I care about. I find it very challenging to be thankful in the midst of despair. The Apostle Paul was human; he knew as he penned those words that they were impossible for him or any of us to do. That’s why, a few verses later, he also reminded us that, “I can do all things through Christ who gives me the strength.” (4:13) – Meaning having an attitude of gratitude in the most difficult of circumstances. Yes, I can do that! The Father can help me see the good, the possibilities, even the blessings that He will bring out of the darkest situations.

Once, I was a “hippie-wanna-be” who chose NOT to fully embrace “hippiedom.” That was good. Now I find myself being a “Jesus-wanna-be” choosing TO fully embrace His Kingdom and all that it offers me in this life and throughout eternity. That is good. I choose to have an attitude of gratitude – even when it’s too difficult for me because I know He will give me the strength.

How Do You Define Success?

Most of us define success in terms of our occupations, income, and possessions. Our culture perpetuates that definition as well. One problem with that concept is that there is no period to that definition. In other words, enough is never enough - mostly due to those darn Jones'! We spend way too much time, energy, and money trying to keep up with them, but they seem to always be one or two steps ahead!

One of my daughters is really good with techno-things like computers and cameras. That's good for me because when I can't figure something out, I call her. She is the one who kept insisting that I change over to an iPhone when the 3GS came out, and I am glad she did! As soon as the 3GS came out, she bought one herself and sold her original iPhone. But when the iPhone 4 was about to be released, she learned that our local provider would only have 60 for the first week or so. She arrived at the store at five o'clock the morning of the big release and was second in line. (As a side note, I haven't updated to the 4 yet, but it is really a great phone that has a camera flash and "face talk" ability. I will update when my contract is up!)

My point is not to rag on my daughter for keeping up with technology - 'cause like I said, I will update my own phone soon. The point is that there is always something else on the horizon that is better or more modern than what we have. I'm positive that as I write, Apple is working on the next generation of the iPhone. We can spend our lives trying to keep up with everything and everyone, but if that's how we define success, it will be fleeting and we will be frustrated human beings.

God's Word has a lot of say about success and prosperity. In the New Testament, Jesus equates a successful life to living an abundant life. Abundant in Him and not in the physical, temporal things of this world. Look at Jesus Himself. I feel certain He would say He lived a successful, prosperous life - even though it was murderously cut short in His thirties. He knew the Father intimately, and He lived out the fruit of the Spirit found in Galations 5. And most importantly, He fulfilled the Father's purpose for His life - on the cross. So if we define success via Jesus, it is 1) knowing the Father intimately, 2) living an abundant life (in the spiritual sense), and 3) fulfilling God's purpose for our lives. Um...doesn't have much to do with the latest gadgets and gizzmos, or bank accounts and addresses, does it?

Jesus showed us what a successful life looks like. We can go back to Joshua to find out how to attain that kind of success. The first nine verses of Joshua is a treasure-trove, but let's concentrate on verse eight.

• "This book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous and then you shall have success."

My paraphrase of that verse goes like this (BTW, it is based on study and research):

• Be sure you read and know the Word of God. Ponder it all the time and in every situation. Obey everything it says. Then you will be successful and prosperous - like Jesus.

Very simple to say; very difficult to live out. Success revolves around knowing God intimately - He reveals Himself through His Word. The more we know His Word, meditate on His Word, and obey His Word, the more we know Him. The better we know Him, the more abundant our lives will be - we can actually live in the fruit of the Spirit - love, peace, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, and faithfulness. And just as Jesus did during his earthly life, we can know and fufill His purpose for our individual lives by knowing Him intimately.

That, my friends, is His definition of success. There is certainly nothing wrong with trying to better ourselves in the worldly definition. Thank goodness I haven't talked myself out of that new iPhone! However, when those desires override our desire to spend time getting to know Him more deeply, our idea of success has shifted, and it's time to re-evaluate our priorities. His desires need to always be put before our own. Then we will taste the sweetness of His presence in our midst.

Patient Obedience and Self-Control...

I have always been an outspoken person - that's just how God designed me. But just because that's how He made me, doesn't mean I've always used that characteristic in a good way and to bring Him glory. In fact, I've used my quick wit and sharp tongue to harm many people throughout my life. Having the ability to use words, written and spoken, in creative, persuasive ways is a blessing and a curse. In high school and college, it helped me win contests and awards; in teaching, it has helped me advance my ideas and connect to people; in my personal life, it has helped me break down the barriers that a disability can build. But the words of my sweet mother have echoed through my head since I was a teenager. "Debbie, your mouth is going to get you into more trouble than you know what to do with!" And she was SO right! That's the curse side of this ability. After teaching for a few years, I ran into my sixth grade teacher at my home church one Sunday. I immediately was transported back to her classroom and replayed the many times I was hateful to her - almost daring her to take me out to the hall and give me spats. Then I thought of my experiences on the other side of that relationship and how it feels as a teacher to be so disrespected. When the final amen was said, I caught up with  her and explained that I had been teaching for a while and just wanted to apologize for my behavior when I was in her classroom. She stared at me with cold, piercing eyes, and said, "You should apologize." WOW! That was like a slap in the face. I left there in disbelief and almost angry that she was so rude. But as I pondered that experience for several days, I began to realize her response came from the hurt I had caused her. God showed me how my actions and words - even as an eleven-year old - had had a lasting, negative affect on this lady. (As a side note, she must have pondered on it also because since then, any time I am in my home church, she seeks me out and is very sweet to me.) It also served as a lesson for me in how fragile my witness for the Lord is. When I am out of control - it will harm my influence for Christ.

The writer of the book of James had this to say about the tongue: "the tongue is a fire, the very word of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell...But no one came tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing." James 3:6-10. Those are very strong words! But so full of truth!

It takes patient obedience to tame the tongue. In fact, it is impossible - without obedience to the Holy Spirit. James said no one came tame the tongue - only through the Spirit, can one get a handle on it. Perhaps that's why God gave the Children of Israel an exercise in holding their tongue before they captured the city of Jericho. The account of taking that fortified city is found in Joshua 6.

The Israelites, who, according to scholars, numbered two million, had just crossed the Jordan River and entered the land promised to them generations before. Moses had died and Joshua was now their spiritual and military leader. Jericho was one of the oldest cities in the world. It had fortified walls that were in some places 25 feet high and 20 feet thick. It was the symbol of military power and strength for that part of the world and was considered invincible. But God is omnipotent! And he purposed that His people would take the city and root out evil from this promised land. Even before He laid out His plan for Joshua, He said to him, "See, I have given Jericho into your hand, with its kings and the valiant warriors." (6:2) The victory had already been won; Joshua and his people just had to be obedient and claim the victory.

Now, God's plan to take the city seems somewhat absurd to us. Joshua was to take part of his army, followed by seven priests carrying trumpets, followed by other priests carrying the Ark of the Lord (which symbolized God's presence) and march around the city once a day for six days. As they were marching, they were to be silent! "You shall not shout nor let your voice be heard nor let a word proceed out your mouth..." (6:10) Okay, it's not like they were planning a sneak-attack. The guards on the watchtowers would see them and alert the city, and that many people marching around would surely stir up a dust cloud. And why do this for six days and allow time for the enemy to ready for an attack? It seems like a recipe for disaster! And then on a personal level, think how difficult it would be to march around that city, knowing you were going to attack it at some point, and not even whisper to the person beside you! I couldn't do it!

Joshua also tells them that on the seventh day, they would march around seven times, then the trumpets would blow, and Joshua would shout. When they heard him shout, they were to shout back. So, on the seventh trip around the city, the trumpets blew, Joshua shouted, and the people "shouted with a great shout and the wall fell down flat." (6:20) That's right...those 25 feet high, 20 feet thick walls fell down flat! Can you imagine the reaction of the Israelites and of the people in the city? When the wall fell down, the Israelites rushed in and took the city. They claimed their victory.

I don't know why God required silence for those six days. I can only surmise that, based on the history of these people, God had truths for them - and us - to learn.

• Patience is a virtue - it is also part of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22). It is NOT natural to man. As we draw closer in our relationship to Christ, the more the fruit of patience grows. The Israelites were having to grow patience as they marched and waited seven days before they took the city. I would have been saying, "Come on. Let's get this over with!" But God was having them wait - on Him and His timing. His timing is perfect.
• Self-control is also part of the fruit of the Spirit, and they were having to work on that as well! The fact that they had to march silently for those six days, was an excercise in self-control - holding their tongues, not grumbling, not asking why or when or how come. It also gave them time to reflect on the Lord. Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God." Sometimes we just need to be quiet and meditate upon the Lord and listen to Him. Too many times our tongues are flapping and we can't even hear God.
• Obedience is not part of the fruit; it the vine that grows the fruit. Without obedience there is no fruit in our walk with God. No love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. He desires and even demands obedience to Him and His Word. "...be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success." (Joshua 1:8) Obedience is the key to defeating our enemy, Satan, and the key to abundant life on this earth.

God wants us to have self-control, which is really Spirit-control, over our human nature. One of those areas for me is the tongue. How do I gain that control? By patiently being obedient to Him. When those three areas are clicking - patience, obedience, and self-control - I am able to claim the victory in all areas of my life that Christ has already won. Do I have perfect control of my tongue? No, not yet. But I can tell you that I have much more control than before. I am a work-in-progress, and as I march on with Him, He is perfecting me until that time when I will stand before Him, and I am claiming the victories along the way!

Have Your Been Sifted...Yet?

I've concluded that the most difficult job in the world is farming the land. It is not as difficult as it used to be with advent of the industrial revolution - tillers, tractors, pickers, combines, balers, etc. Just think for a moment how different life was before those inventions! Think how difficult growing crops was before even the most basic of tools were around. It all goes back to Adam. Remember how God told him that because of his sin, he would have to work the land for their sustenance, and it would be back-breaking work? That was not just a play on words.

In Luke 22:31, Jesus told Peter that Satan wanted to sift him like wheat. So, let's examine what that agriculture term suggests. Sifting grain such as wheat or barley is the process of separating the chaff, little stones, and sometimes tares from the kernels that eventually make meal. In Bible times, this was primarily done by the women using a sieve of some kind or sometimes just shaking the grain furiously by hand. It was usually a long, tedious process. Basically, the purpose is to separate the good parts from the bad. Little stones and dirt are obviously not good, and tares are weeds that choke out the good fruit. But what about chaff? It is part of the plant. Chaff is the dry, scaly protective covering of the seed grain. Once the grain is mature, the outer casing begins to dry and pull away from the seed. Its usefulness is over. Eventually, it will fall off and be blown away by the wind. When sifting, that process is speeded up so the grain can be harvested and turned into meal.

What was Satan wanting? He wanted permission to try and break Peter. No doubt, he had been watching Peter and the other disciples for three years as they followed the Christ. He had seen Peter's brashness and impulsiveness, and knew Pete could be a hot-head. He knew Peter's weaknesses. Satan thought this just might be his chance to break Peter and get to Jesus. He wasn't successful in breaking Jesus in the wilderness, so this was another chance. Remember, Satan and his demons are in constant conflict with God and His angels - Good vs. evil. He was hoping that Peter was all chaff and no seed.

This should be a wake-up call for all believers in Christ. Once you accept Jesus as your personal savior, Satan does not forget about you. He still prowls about like a hungry lion seeking someone to devour (I Peter 5:8). No, he cannot rob you of your eternal salvation. However, he can rob you of the abundant life Jesus wants you to experience on this earth. He can devour your joy, peace, and your faith. If he is successful in that, he will prevent you from sharing your faith and being a godly influence to those with whom you come into contact. In other words, you will still go to heaven, but he doesn't want you to take anyone with you.

How does Satan sift us today? Well, be certain he knows our weaknesses - just as he did Peter's. Some of the most common sieves we filter through are physical sufferings, financial hardships, career issues, family problems, and a vast array of personal temptations. In those trials (sifting), Satan tries to shake us hard enough for the chaff to fall away. His hope is that our seed is dried up and is of no use to us or anyone else. But the person who has a growing, dynamic relationship with Jesus won't have a dry, scaly covering that is so fragile that it falls off when shaken. And his seed will be ripe for planting whenever and wherever the opportunity presents itself.

I hope you didn't miss the fact that Satan had to ask permission from Jesus to even approach Peter. Talk about the sovereignty of God! And we see in subsequent verses that Jesus allowed Peter to be sifted - and he didn't do too well. That could be a whole post of its own!

Another remarkable thing is seen in v. 32. Jesus, still speaking to Peter, says, "but I have prayed for you, that your faith may not fail; and you, when once your have turned again, strengthen your brothers." Here's our WOW moment! Jesus prayed for Peter! And Jesus prays for us - He intercedes for us to the Father! He knows us, each one, by name, and takes us before the Father and expresses our needs. This is the Creator, the One who breathed life into man's existence! He also knew Peter would falter - and told him so. Of course, the brash, young Pete exclaimed his loyalty to Jesus and pooh-poohed the very thought of such. And, again, we have the benefit of knowing the rest of the story. Jesus also knew that Pete would come around and realize he had danced with the devil and would turn back to Jesus. He prayed that Peter's sifting experience would make him stronger in his faith, and that he would be a source of strength and encouragement to other believers. Was Jesus' prayer answered? Oh, yeah! Big time!

We know from Peter's experience that sometimes our trials and adversities are a direct result of Satan's work around us. We also know that sometimes God, in His infinite wisdom, allows us to be tested and sifted. There are times when we need the dry scales knocked off so that we can be spiritually healthy. We have the assurance that Jesus is with the Father watching and praying for us by name that our faith will be strengthened, and we can then strengthen the faith of our brothers and sisters.

So, the question that is posed for us is, how will we fare when Satan sifts us like wheat? Because he will - sift us, you know. Is your "faith" made up of dirt and weeds and chaff so that when you are shaken, it will blow away with the wind? Or, is there a plump, ripe seed smack dab in the core of your faith that will sustain you through the trials when they come?

Jesus is praying for you - and for me - that our faith will grow strong so that it will sustain us through whatever life brings our way. That's a WOW!

Sibling Rivalry...

If you have a brother(s) or sister(s), you have probably experienced sibling rivalry to some degree. I have an older sister and an older brother, but we are all spread out with four to six years between us. So we were not so close in age as to be competitive with each other. Psychologists tells us that birth order makes a huge difference in how one learns to relate and cope with others throughout their lives. I am the "baby" of the family and also experienced a bout with a devastating disease when I was two years old. So I know that I was treated differently than my brother and sister. Did these things impact my relationship with my siblings? Yes, no doubt they did. It is often said that the baby of the family is spoiled and not held to such an exacting standard as the older children, especially the eldest. I have to say from my personal experience as the baby and as the mom of two children, that is pretty much how it goes. Then in my case, add a debilitating disease, and for the older kids, you get disaster! No doubt, there were times in our younger days, when my sister and brother got fed up with the extra time and attention my parents gave me. They were often shuffled off to stay with relatives while my folks stayed with me six hours away from our home. I am sure there were activities they had to forgo because of my situation, and times when they were sick of hearing something like, "Don't be rough with Debbie." I know myself well enough to know that had the roles been reversed, I would have tired quickly of the world seeming to revolve around one them. We are all human.

When we pick up the story of Jacob's family in Genesis 37, we run into sibling rivalry at its worst. Jacob had twelve sons by four different women, but only the youngest son, Joseph, was the son of Rachel, the love of Jacob's life. It's obvious that Jacob favored Joseph from the time he was born. That favoritism did not set well with the brothers, and because they were human, jealousy, hatred, and bitterness took seed in their hearts and bloomed into full-blown treachery.

At this point, I encourage you to read Genesis 37, if you haven't, and get a feel for the family dynamics in Jacob's brood. It was dicey and no one, including Jacob and Joseph, was without fault. No, the brothers did not react in a godly way to Jacob giving Joseph a "coat of many colors" that was similar to what men of high standing would wear. It wasn't the normal dull-colored, short sleeve tunic that most teenage boys his age wore. Now think about this for a minute. If the father had always favored the little brother and then crowned him with this expensive, royal-like garment, they would naturally be angry. I'm not saying their attitude was right, but it was natural. Sometimes we seem to focus on their actions without considering why they felt the way they did. When we put ourselves in others' shoes, we sometimes see ourselves.

Joseph didn't always help his plight with the brothers, either. I mean, did he have to share his dreams with them? Dreams that put them subservient to him. According to Warren Wiersbe (see my Bible study references on the left), it was most likely God's will that the brothers and then Jacob hear about his dreams. However, the problem might have been in how Joseph presented it to them. You know, presentation is the thing! How we say something can instill peace or insight riot! Joseph was a bit brash and perhaps flaunted his favoritism when he should have shown humility.

Anyhow, when Jacob sent Joseph out to check on the brothers, the last straw had been drawn. Galations 5:19-21 tells us that the deeds of the flesh are, among other things, enimities, strife, jealousy, anger, disputes, and envying. Take your pick - they were all present as the brothers connived a way to get rid of Joseph without his blood literally being on their hands. After stripping him of his coat and throwing him into a deep pit from which he could not climb out, they ended up selling him as a slave to some Ishmaelites who were passing by on their way to Egypt. (Ishmaelites - get the connection?) When they returned home, they took the coat, which they had dipped in blood, to their father who then assumed the boy had been devoured by some wild animal.

Now, how's that for sibling rivalry gone too far? What can we learn from this episode in history? Many things starting with these:

• Jealousy, hatred, and bitterness are an all consuming fire. Whether they thread through families or other relationships, they are costly - if not deadly. They are listed in Galations as deeds of the flesh because they are natural, human reactions. However, they can be countered and overcome by the fruit of the Holy Spirit, who lives in the heart of a true believer.That's what putting on the "new" nature is all about.
• Favoritism is a destructive force and has no place in any of our relationships. Whether it's family, work, or social situations, it will breed the deeds of the flesh. The outcome will not be good. Aren't you glad that Jesus knows no favorites? He loves me regardless of what I do or don't do, and He died for all and does not pick and choose to whom He offers salvation, He gives a royal cloak to ALL who receive Him.
• We need to "grow up in Christ." Joseph learned about God from his father Jacob, and followed His teachings. But when God gave him some spiritual insight, he handled it poorly. He reacted with arrogance instead of humility, and it fueled the hatred of his brothers. The fruit of the Spirit, proof that one is growing in relationship with Him, is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galations 5:22-24). Joseph could have benefited from some of those.
• Ultimately, God is in control and He will see His will through. We will never know if all that transpired between the brothers and Joseph was God's will or if He just allowed it. But, if you have read on in Genesis, you know the end of the story. God's people were saved from certain death by famine because of the role Joseph came to play in the government of Egypt. Once again, we see the truth of the promise in Romans 8:28 - "All things work together for good to them who love the Lord and are called according to His purposes."

Sibling rivalry is part of the natural course of growing up with brothers and sisters. Enough said about that. But think about sibling rivalry within the body of Christ. We are brothers and sisters through His blood. When we let the deeds of the flesh control our motives, actions, and words, we are instruments that can infuse that same all-consuming fire witnessed in Jacob's family into our spiritual family.

Woe be to those who mess with God's family!